First Hurdle Cleared

We finally selected an agency and submitted our application to become adoptive parents. It is finally happening! I know this is just the first step of a long journey, but I feel like it is a big one due to everything we've gone through just to get to this point.  And contemplating the various options before us took longer than expected. I thought we had decided on a private agency but then after talking to a friend who adopted her two daughters from Ethiopia, I felt compelled to at least explore the idea of adopting an older kid(s) rather than an infant. Since international adoptions have been on the decline recently, we attended a meeting through the state of Oregon and learned more about the children that are available for adoption through the Department of Human Services - most of whom have been removed from abusive or neglectful situations.  Even though the meeting was intended to only give a general overview, it was quite eye opening. Unlike the private adoption agencies which spent a lot of time during orientation discussing their success rates and the benefits of the services they offer and the quality of time and skills of their case workers, the DHS approach was a "quick and dirty" introduction to the levels of bureaucracy with which we would be engaging. And this crash course was much more exclusive than inclusive as we were told time and again, "If you don't want people coming to your house, opening your cupboards and looking through your drawers, this might not be a good choice for you." Or, "If you think this is going to be like raising your own children, this might not be a good choice for you.". Or, "If you have a problem with us talking to your friends and relatives about you, this might not be a good choice for you." Not that I have a problem with any of those things and I am still interested in adopting older children in the future, but the way the message was delivered was the sort indication we needed to push us towards going with a private agency. Not this. Not for us. Not right now.  And once we decided, I knew the agency we picked was a better choice for us.

I'm sure that we are in for just as much red tape unraveling and hoop jumping despite not going through the State.  Adoption is nothing if not litigious and involved, but for now, it's worth it for us to feel like it's OK to ease in to this process.  And I also feel like we're ready.